Ted Cruz, Redefining Creepiness

No, it’s not “Ted Cruz” week at No Filter Network. No, Ted Cruz didn’t lift the suspension of his presidential campaign this week. No, Ted Cruz is not engulfed in another National Enquirer cheating scandal.

We just so happen to have two new Alf-related articles on No Filter Network today due to pure coincidence. That, and well, we enjoy highlighting the creepiness and overwhelming distaste surrounding Cruz at all times.

This newly published photo of Ted Cruz basically redefines what the word “creepy” is capable of meaning.

The photo above was used in a recent Politico piece detailing Cruz’s return to his normal duties as a US Senator after failing to win the Republican Presidential Nomination. Just as we covered here, the piece details how Cruz is faced with the challenge of building bridges with colleagues that he previously burned.

HOW-EVAH, that’s beside the point.

What really matters is to us is that the picture of Cruz looks like it can be used for the newest print edition of some “Paraphilia Anonymous” magazine of some sorts. Nah, the photo doesn’t capture a beaten down politician determined to rise like a Phoenix. Instead, it simply looks like a creepy guy resembling Alf who’s caressing a large wooden door.

Seriously, if you asked an alien who touched down on USA soil for the first time ever, what type of person is depicted in the picture, they would probably go with an “Objectophiliac” before “Politician”. Ted Cruz looks like some whackadoo who is in love with an inanimate object.

Then again, what’s the difference? It’s not like a majority of politicians don’t already operate as objectophiliacs in their ever-lasting attraction to an inanimate object known as “MONEY”. 

And you know it boy.


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