PSA Addressed To Ted Cruz and John Kasich (Douchey Version)

ICYMI: Ted Cruz and John Kasich suspended their presidential campaigns and dropped out of the race for the Republican nomination last week. 

Cruz (ALF) had this to say: “We left it all on the field in Indiana. We gave it everything we’ve got but the voters chose another path,” Cruz said. “So with a heavy heart but with boundless optimism for the long-term future of our nation, we are suspending our campaign.”

Johnny Boy had this to say: “I have always said that the Lord has a purpose for me as he has for everyone,” Kasich told reporters in Columbus, Ohio. “And as I suspend my campaign today, I have renewed faith, deeper faith, that the Lord will show me the way forward, and fulfill the purpose of my life.”


After getting slaughtered by DonDon in Indiana by a YUGE margin, both GOP runner-ups finally decided to throw in the towel…. not that it really mattered anyway. Cruz was already mathematically eliminated from earning the nomination outright via 1,237 dellies (unless he won the remaining of the state-primaries at a +90% margin per clip). Cruz was only there to keep Trump from reaching the coveted 1,237 dellies, while also pretending that he can be less than 100%-hateable to his Republican “peers”. As for Kasich, as we’ve mentioned plenty of times, dude has been straight burning campaign money at an insane rate for months now. Considering how ridiculous it was that Kasich was still in the race at this point, I was actually kind of shocked to hear Johnny Boy was dropping out prior to the nomination. 


At the No Filter Network, we’re all about proper etiquette and using our manners (…..). So in the spirit of the mantras we live by, we have a nice send off for Alf and Johnny Boy via a sweet little PSA:




Hey John Kasich: YA FUCKIN’ DONE SON. 



PS: Don’t be shocked when Cruz eventually grovels to Trump in hope of attaining 1 of the 3 nominations: Vice President, Supreme Court Justice, Attorney General. 







2 thoughts on “PSA Addressed To Ted Cruz and John Kasich (Douchey Version)

  1. Pingback: The GOP Only Has Themselves To Blame For “Trump” | NO FILTER NETWORK

  2. Pingback: Donald Trump’s “Last Week Tonight” | NO FILTER NETWORK

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