It’s Goin’ Down: Wisconsin Primaries

Meet me in Madison, it’s goin’ down. Meet me in the Milwaukee, it’s goin’ down. Meet me in Green Bay, it’s goin’ down. Anywhere you [vote], guarantee it’s goin’ down. 

 

YO! Presidential primaries for both the Republican and Democratic parties are goin’ down in Wisconsin tonight. 

Wisconsin will feature the first presidential primary of April for both the Elephants and the Donkeys tonight. To say we have a 2/3 chubby already cooking downstairs would be an surrrrious understatement. We’re ready to freaking quench that political thirst that has been building up since March 26th and March 22nd (the last Dem and GOP primary nights). Here are some important “developments” that have gone down on the campaign trail since our last round of primaries:

  1. Donald Trump’s Campaign Manager, Corey Lewandowski, was arrested for battering a political reporter. In the least surprising news of all time, Trump didn’t even flinch and pledged his full support to his boy Corey. Kind of ironic that Trump has more conviction while backing a potential criminal vs his “own party”.
  2. The Bernie Sanders campaign actually started to pretend that it wants to win the Democratic Presidential Nomination. After spending months bending over for Hillary and acquiescing all of Debbie Wasserman-Schultz’s wishes, Bernie Sanders has thrown some shade at The Hilldabeast. Among other things, The Brooklyn Brawler addressed Clinton’s historical pandering to Big Oil and her constant attempts to dodge various debates against Sanders. The Clinton camp is basically admitting that Hillary in front of a camera will do more damage than it will do good.
  3. Donald Trump said women should be punished for getting abortions….. I don’t think there’s really much more to say about that one (other than the hilarious fact that Trump walked-back the comment, and then contradicted himself with a new comment, all within a matter of 2 hours).

So yeah, a political storm is a brewin’. 

 

Let’s break shit down a little further per party:

GOP: 

As Trump continues to stab himself in the back with idiotic statements, the Republican Establishment has grown even MORE certain that Trump would be a disaster for the country (or the current status quo?). Not only does the GOP think Trump wouldn’t stand a chance against Hillary, the GOP is also terrified that Trump will squash the existing status quo among the “boys club” of career-politicians. As a result, more and more GOP members have provided their endorsement to Ted Cruz. Considering Cruz is a man that is notorious for being hated by his own party, this speaks to the Establishment’s desperation. While Cruz is the only one that has beaten Trump in multiple states, “Lyin Ted” hasn’t established the voter support that he could win the nomination outright (meaning no brokered convention). Wisconsin Governor and failed presidential candidate Scott Walker has basically spent the last week assembling a smorgasbord of Wisconsin politicians to speak out against Donald Trump. I have a sneaking suspicion that Walker’s strategy will go about as smooth as his presidential campaign did.

Meanwhile, Cruz is having a straight up BITCH FIT with John Kasich right now. 

As we’ve covered countless times, John Kasich has no god damn chance of winning the Republican nomination. Since Kasich has campaign money to spend, Johnny Boy is hoping that if he just sticks around and stays “relevant”, he may be an option during a potential brokered convention. In my not so fucking humble opinion, that will not happen. If and when the Republicans have a brokered convention in Cleveland, I seriously doubt that the nomination would go to anyone that ALREADY LOST TO TRUMP. 

Delegates on the line for the GOP: 42

Democrats:

 

Almost every poll done over the past week hoping to project the winner in Wisconsin has been super close. While we don’t like putting too much stock into random political polls at NFN, almost every single poll we saw this week featured a tight-ass race. Wisconsin was once considered a relatively easy victory state for the Clinton campaign. Unfortunately for The Hilldabeast, The Brooklyn Brawler has a couple 1-2 combinations left in the tank that he is ready to throw. Whether it’s repeated news regarding the FBI’s investigation into Hillary Clinton and her associates, or Sanders’ increased bravado over the past month, Wisconsin has become a straight up coin-toss. Hell, you can tell that even the slightest bit of confrontation from the Bernie Campaign completely rattles Hillary and her house of cards. 

 

Delegates on the line tonight for the DNC: 86

 

“Have you ever seen a Chevy with the butterfly doors?”

Young Joc It's Goin Down.jpg

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One thought on “It’s Goin’ Down: Wisconsin Primaries

  1. Pingback: Sanders and Cruz Prevail Amongst The Cheeseheads | NO FILTER NETWORK

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